A Tribute to Alycia Kilpatrick
Written by Ashley Pearson @ashleysinlondon
Born in 1973 in Washington D.C., Alycia Kilpatrick, nee Oaklander, was born to parents Harvey, a psychologist and mother Leah, a homemaker, who were both Brooklyn natives. Alycia had an idyllic childhood with her younger sister Laura and would go on to attend James Madison University where she graduated in 1995 with a degree in English.
Alycia moved to Manhattan’s Upper East side in 1996 to pursue a career in Public Relations. Initially at Porter Novelli, she would go on to run public relations for fashion pioneer Eleanor Lambert and American fashion designer Cynthia Rowley. She also was a freelance lifestyle fashion writer for The Washingtonian.
Despite her busy and glittering career, Alycia grew a committed circle of girlfriends with whom she deftly navigated much of Manhattan throughout her 20’s. Loyal and fun, Alycia was someone who never missed an opportunity to be kind. A thoughtful gesture, a supportive word, a compliment, she found great joy in making others feel good about themselves. Always quick to encourage, she had mastered the art of reassurance.
For her there was just one great love, her husband of 17 years, John Kilpatrick. Entirely devoted, in John she had found her true partner and soulmate, and as their relationship grew from strength to strength, it accurately embodied the concept of ‘meant to be’. Her marriage was also the beginning of what would become the most important chapter of her life: motherhood. It was her greatest joy. Her children were her life’s breath and happiness. They were exactly the people she was born to mother. She built her life upon her intention and determination to raise wonderful, joyful children who are resilient, thoughtful, well-mannered and kind. Her focus was on her family and loved ones, and she delighted in the details. There was nothing too small for her to praise or give her attention to — no matter how minor– she was perpetually engaged and attentive. In fact, she was one of the world’s all-time great audiences. In a world that’s full of chaos and noise, Alycia knew how to listen. She really listened. She never, ever rushed you to the end of a story or punchline- and had a deep, infectious laugh that was irrepressible and completely contagious.
Her taste level was impeccable. Immaculate grooming and presentation were standard for her. She instinctively knew exactly what to wear, where to go, what to say and how to phrase it — she embodied a breath-taking natural elegance and grace. And she was generous with what came naturally for her, she spent her life smoothing out the rough edges for everyone else.
Her magic was in her spirit. Her eyes and smile were reflections of a pure and untroubled heart. Gentle, uplifting and generous, Alycia was authentically delighted for others in their successes — her face would literally light up -and she magnified their victories with her own enthusiasm and praise. Deeply compassionate, she was also magnanimous and quick to forgive.
Even-tempered and easy-going yes, but never docile or weak, Alycia had a determination and fortitude that was something that the rest of us will forever stand in awe of. Her courageous and caring spirit will never be forgotten. And in the end, her resilience and inner strength surpassed what any of us had even realized. She outshone us all.
A devoted wife to John and mother to Emily and Bailey, survived by her mother Leah, her father Harvey, her sister Laura and her niece Kahlan. Alycia was beloved by everyone who knew her, and after a courageous battle with cancer, passed away on October 23, 2020 in New York City.
In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer center, to help raise money for critical cancer research, in memory of Alycia Kilpatrick.
If family or friends prefer to give a donation by check, kindly make payable to Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center, and mail to:
Attn: Rachel Flannery
Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center, Office of Development
PO Box 27106
New York, NY 10087
Please indicate on the check memo line that the gift is in memory of Alycia Kilpatrick.
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